I Sleepwalked At School And Embarrassed Myself Publicly

Hello, guys! My name is Ariana. It’s not a secret that we all tend to make
mistakes and fail. And we all feel bad about it afterward. But what if I tell you that a fatal mistake
I made once, made me feel so guilty and unworthy, that I started suffering from a dramatic form
of a sleeping disorder. In other words I turned into a sleepwalker. It all happened many years ago on a beautiful
summer morning. I was seven years old and my younger brother
Gavin was only four. We snuck out of the house and ran to the river
to go for a swim. We had so much fun! We were playing hide-and-seek and it was my
turn to be the seeker. I looked for Gavin everywhere, honestly! I knew he was really good at hiding, but at
one point, I realized he just wasn’t there! First, I thought that this sneaky kid wanted
to scare me and just left me there and went back home, but I didn’t find him there either. Then I realized something horrible had happened. I burst into tears and told everything to
my parents. It was all a blur. They looked for Gavin for two days until he
was finally found. He must have been carried away by the current
and never made it out of the water. There are no words in the world that could
even remotely describe my parents’ grief. They were both absolutely broken. As for me, I was stunned and scared to death. I felt like a monster. I had done the most horrible thing ever and
there was no way to go back, to get Gavin back. My father was a very generous and kind person. He realized I hadn’t meant for all this to
happen, so he found the strength to support me and to forgive me. But not my mother. She tried to avoid me and she couldn’t even
look me in the eye anymore. It was really painful, but I knew I deserved
it. “Time went on, but things were not getting
any better. Not long afterward I started having trouble
sleeping. I would occasionally wake up in the kitchen
or in the bathroom, turning the tap on without realizing what I was doing. But in most cases I would go to Gavin’s room
and tidy up or play theater with his toys. Just like I used to do when I played with
him! I even sang lullabies in front of his empty
bed. It was so weird of me! Of course, my parents heard the noise at night
and would always come to check on me. My mother would get furious every time she
would find me in Gavin’s bedroom. She was just shaking with anger! And of course she didn’t believe I was sleepwalking. She was sure I had gone to my brother’s room
to annoy her and to make her feel even worse. And even after my father took me to the doctor,
who confirmed my diagnosis, this still did not convince my mother otherwise. Months went by, then years. My life turned into torture. My sleepwalking was getting worse and there
were no pills that could help me. Almost ten years has passed since my brother
drowned in the river and with each passing day, my mother would hate and abuse me more
and more. She would never waste the chance to tell me
off for my grades or my unwashed dishes. Or for anything she could, actually! Of course, I was never allowed to go out with
friends or go to parties. And at the same time, I wasn’t very eager
to go anyway, to be honest! I think, subconsciously, I felt like I didn’t
have the right to have any kind of fun. I tried to keep my head down and my mouth
shut, but one day things just got out of control. The night before it happened, I sleepwalked
again and went into Gavin’s room. I woke up standing on the table with his favorite
teddy bear in my hands. I heard my mother yelling: ‘She is doing it
again! She is driving me crazy!’ She grabbed me and pushed me out the door
of his room. I couldn’t sleep a wink that night. I was hugging Gavin’s teddy bear and crying
and of course I was very sleepy at school the next day. So, I was sitting in my history class, doing
my best to not let my eyes close. But suddenly I realized I was not sitting
anymore. I was standing in the middle of the classroom. Everybody was staring at me. My teacher’s face was red and he angrily asked
me: ‘Why are you misbehaving during my lesson? What are you even thinking?’ And as usual I didn’t remember anything, so
I didn’t even have the slightest idea what kind of crazy stuff I had done that time. I learned about it later in the principal’s
office, when the teacher was telling the story to my parents. I was walking back and forth with my eyes
wide open, crying out some senseless words. My dad immediately saved the situation and
told them about my sleep issues. It was convincing enough for both the history
teacher and the principal, but as usual, not for my mother. When we got back home, we had a horrible fight. She said she felt like I was a curse for her
and that she wished that it was me who had drowned in that lake, not my brother. It cut me more than hundreds of pieces of
glass shards could. Even though my dad stood his ground and tried
to back me up, nothing really mattered anymore. I couldn’t get those horrible words out of
my head. They kept on spinning around and around, like
a record. And that was the beginning of the end. As I was lying in my bed and I promised myself
that I would never let my mom hurt me again. And my body heard me. ”
“I woke up at 4 a.m. to some horrible screaming. I found myself in my parents’ room. I was standing over my mother’s head, holding
one of my father’s dumbbells. You can’t imagine how terrified I was! I immediately threw it on the floor and ran
away. I locked myself up in my room and covered
my ears. I didn’t want to hear any more insults from
my mom. And there was no way to tell her I didn’t
mean to hurt her. In the morning, my dad came into my room. He looked really miserable. I asked him what had happened, I had already
guessed myself though. My mother had packed up and left for the hills. She also took most of Gavin’s stuff with her. And the teddy bear as well! After that my father and I didn’t hear from
her for a couple of weeks, maybe even more. It was all just killing me. No matter how much my mom hated me, I still
loved her and I wanted her to come back. I had almost lost any hope of seeing her again,
until one day. It was the anniversary of Gavin’s death – the
blackest day of the year. And it was the first anniversary my father
and I had spent without my mom. She didn’t even call us or pick up the phone
when dad called her. It seemed she had just erased both of us from
her life. That was the moment I really started to think
it would really have been better if I had drowned in the lake, and not Gavin.” ” I was lying on the sofa in the living room
when I suddenly heard a giggle. My heart started beating faster. I could swear that it was Gavin! I jumped on my feet and went to his room. The light was on and the teddy bear was sitting
in the middle of the room. I couldn’t believe my eyes. ‘Is mom back?’ I thought. Then I heard that giggle again. I followed it and went out of the house. My feet got wet and cold, because I hadn’t
even put my shoes on. But I didn’t care. I kept on following those giggles and I finally
saw him. I saw a little figure in the bushes. I couldn’t see him properly in the dark, but
I was sure it was him. He was wearing the same cute trunks and he
hadn’t changed a bit since I saw him last time, ten years ago. I looked around and realized we were standing
at the bank of that very river. I felt tears streaming down my face. I wept and cried out: ‘ I am so sorry, Gavin! Please, forgive me!’ But he only gave me another giggle and suddenly
jumped into the water. It didn’t take me long to jump after him. I couldn’t let this happen again! I tried to grab him, but then I felt somebody
grab me. After a moment I found myself lying on the
ground. I was slowly coming back to my senses when
I saw a familiar face. It was my mother. She was holding me in her arms and crying. She kept on repeating: ‘ Don’t you ever do
that again.’ It was all just a dream. I never used to remember my dreams before,
but I had remembered this one so clearly that I would have sworn it was real. I told my mother everything, in detail. She was listening to me very carefully and
I saw that she believed me. ”
Then she told me she had been sitting near the lake during that whole evening. She didn’t feel like there was another place
for her to go on the anniversary of Gavin’s death. And then she saw me with my eyes wide open. I was bare-foot, wearing my pajamas. She asked me why I had come, but I didn’t
say anything, I just jumped into the water. My mom said she had gotten so scared for me,
that she rushed to the lake to rescue me. It’s weird to say this, but I don’t think
my mom or I had ever felt happier on such an unhappy day. We accepted what had happened and finally
let it go. Things are really looking up now. My mother has come back home. We are all trying to get back to normal life
as much as possible. My mom is like a new person now. She’s doing her best to get along with me. It took us ten years to finally forgive each
other and come back together. But it was all worth it. We can’t change the past, we can only learn
to live with it. As for me, I feel so happy and released now. Eternal self-blame makes no sense. It leads you nowhere but to destruction. Believe it or not, my sleepwalking has also
changed. I remember most of my dreams and I’ve now
learned how to control them. I hope to get rid of them completely one day.


  1. This was not your fault. It’s horrible how your mother treated you, but I am glad that you guys are a family again 😍

  2. i sleeped walk once and my mom told me that i was walking to our neighbors house and she carried me and put me in bed again

  3. she was a fucking child only 7 that is not her fault plus put a bolt on the door AND child proof window locks if you're near a lake, canal, pond, river or have a pool

  4. Maybe your brother is still alive because even if he had drowned surely he may have given a scream before he completely drowned

  5. I am happy you two finally come to a understanding. She lost her baby boy and you lost a baby brother. It’s weird what grieve can do to us. My husband lost his brother due to cancer and he said he could still hear him cry because it just hurt so much for the little guy every time the had to take blood from him. I feel so bad for for my in laws.

  6. 5:50……hhmmm so am guessing when you heard your brother died and you haded that sleep issue maybe thoughs combined and made you sleep walk pretending that your brother is still there so maybe that your mothers words combined to the sleep issue to nit just make your sleep walk but made you sleep kill but your target was your mom

  7. It wasn't her fault Gavin died. It was an accident. Thank god her mom eventually forgave her, even though the things she said to her was inexusable, especially when she said she wished that it had been her who drowned in the lake instead of Gavin.

  8. why would you make some random animated girl showing her tits saying "i embarrassed myself publicly"? no hat i really love these videos just a question i had

  9. What a HORRIBLE mother. It disgusts me how she can just hate her child like that. And the way that she said that her father decided to forgive her, you don't decide with your child whether to still LOVE them or not. She was only 7! She just wanted her and her brother to have fun! HER OWN MOTHER HATES HER CHILD. Unbelievable. Now, I'm an agnostic, but I honestly hope that mother burns in hell for all the pain she caused her OWN baby! How did she think her kid felt when she found out that her brother died because if her? She only made her life even more of a living hell. Disgusting. That poor, poor kid. 🥺 I know she finally forgave her, but still. Before that it just made me so mad… and now after years and years she just got away with all that abuse once she drove her own child to almost kill herself?

  10. 8:10 that was the spot that he tried to hide, and thats how he hid himself but drowned. I think that its really creepy cause her brother was trying to show her how he died or he was trying to drown her :^
    Anyone thought like meh?

  11. Why would some children want to "love" a person who hate them? Wierd… Deep down inside, subconsciously, she hated her mom as she wanted to drop her dumbbells on her mom…

  12. Four fifths of this story: I THINK U AR A CURSE I WISH IT WAS U WHO JUMPED IN THE RIVER 8:26:
    jumps in river grabs her
    dOnT yOu EvEr Do ThAt AgAiN

  13. This, is less believable than Last Shelter: Survival Ads.

    This, has more click bait than Jaystation.

    ACTUALLY HAPPENED is a frick word.

  14. I'm really sorry about what happened to your brother. Ans also, I appreciate the fact that you faced your problems without giving up.

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